The other day I got home early from work and decided to go for a little run. Tracey warned me that it probably wasn't the best time to go running since it was raining like crazy outside. I told her not to worry, it couldn't be that bad. About halfway through the run a duck came waddling up to me laughing and said here's your sign, it was then that I started to see the wisdom in her advice. I then started thinking of the other things I'd learned the hard way to avoid and came up with a top ten list of those things and why. So here they are in no particular order:1. Lettting your daughter have a large jewelry box even if it is a gift.........because then she thinks she needs to fill it up.
2. Shopping at Wal-Mart........because it's Wal-Mart.
3.Throwing snowballs at an un-marked police car.....do I need to expound on that?
4. Putting your son's hair in pony-tails, even if it is crazy hair day at preschool........because it's your son!
5.Talking back to your wife.......because you may end up with a black eye(see picture below)...Just kidding- it's actually from basketball.
6. Driving a Ford pinto in a blizzard.......because you may end up with frostbite in strange areas when that pinto can't quite make it through the snowbank you tried to drive it through and you have to walk home.
7. Driving an Ford pinto anywhere.......beacause it's a Ford pinto.
8. Trying to doorbell ditch with a snowball that has a rock in it when the doorbell is located next to a large picture window........because you may miss the doorbell.
9. Running in a torrential downpour in shorts in the middle of January......two reasons here, because you may end up with hypothermia, and frostbite on your legs- and you may end up with chaffed nipples consequently having to wear band-aids on these same nipples.
10. Betting on a "sure win" football game with money that you don't have......just trust me on this one- don't do it.
5 comments:
A bandaid...WHERE? You've got to be kidding! A very wise man once said, "Experience keeps a dear school, but fools will learn in no other." (Ben Franklin) Enough said!
I never thought I'd see your nipples! hahahaha
-Claudia
Shaved chest hair.
I'm still angry about the frostbitten ears. I'm surpirsed I didn't have to recover by getting in a sleeping bag with you.
By the way, I thought Tracey was wrong when she said that having a 'Man Blog' made you effeminate. However, I'm starting to see her point (you have cute little kittens as your main image).
I have to disagree with the Wal-Mart one. It's the only place to go in this town.
The nipple one reminds me of the Rabies Awareness run on The Office. Did you see that one?
Just make sure if you're going to doorbell ditch with a snowball, you're wearing a ski mask and riding a bike.
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